The World of Kids

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When children walk into your ministry area, you should be the most exciting, most encouraging, most “want-to-be-around” person they encounter!

Here are a few things you can do to make a child’s day in your KidMin:

  • Smile at them and let your eyes light up when you see them
  • Look them in the eyes when you talk with them
  • Talk TO and WITH them… Not DOWN at them
  • Be super interested in any news they share with you (remember: it’s a big deal to have a loose or missing tooth, a new haircut, new shoes, a new stuffed animal, etc).
  • Notice and point out their shoes – trust me on this one
  • Shake their hand – they think this is very grown-up
  • Engage in any activity they are doing and have fun while doing it
  • Publicly “Catch” them behaving during class and compliment them
  • Always call any prizes you are going to give away: “Mine” and “My” as in: who is going to win “my candy bar?”
  • If they tell you sad news, pray with them… right then and there
  • Offer to thumb-wrestle any of them for a best 2 out of 3

The list is incomplete… obviously!

What would you add to it?

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Everything a kid tells you is important.

You may not think it’s important, but to that kid, at that moment, it’s the most important thing in their world.

We as adults have, over time, developed a filter called: “THE STUFF IMPORTANT TO ME” filter.  And we react accordingly.  If someone tells you something that is interesting to YOU or in some way creates a commonality – YOU naturally react with genuine interest.  YOU react with attention.  YOU react because YOU actually care.

But when someone tells you something that you have no interest in, you may try to react as though you care – because you don’t really want to offend the person trying to tell you something.  But you’re not really listening, are you?

When that child walks up to you and shows you his loose tooth… this is a big deal – no wait! It’s a BIG DEAL!  When she tells you that it was her birthday yesterday… it’s a BIG DEAL!  When a kids tells you that his family is taking him on vacation to “Happy World”, it’s a BIG DEAL!  When she explains that her dog is lost… it’s a BIG DEAL!  When they point to their new shoes… it’s a BIG DEAL!  You all know what I’m talking about. It happens all weekend long… and that’s a good thing!

But, how many times have you had one of these experiences only to usher that child to his seat and tell him politely that he can tell you later? After all, it’s time to start class, right.

To a child, you may be the most important person in their world at that moment that needs to know this information.  Your reaction will determine their significance at that very moment in THEIR WORLD. And if you’re the one who made them feel significant at that moment, you have earned their attention from that moment on.  Try it – I promise, it works!

Turn on your listening ears the next time you’re with kids and Be blessed

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Stop Using that Rubber Chicken!

These kids are bored, sometimes, because, they keep seeing the same props over and over and over again. Sure, you bought that rubber chicken because you knew the kids would laugh when you pulled it out of your briefcase. And I commed you. Every #kidmin leader needs a rubber chicken! But ever since, that thing had shown up every time you need to illustrate the concept of fear, or anytime a character needed a funny prop to display. Maybe for you, it’s not a rubber chicken. Maybe its a flaming Bible, a fake brain, a decorated gift box or any other oddity or novelty item that has adorned your children’s ministry supply closet.

It seems easy to pull these props – it’s our default setting. “I need something extra here… hmm… ah ha! I’ll use this pair of jumbo sunglasses!” But are your kids seeing those jumbo sunglasses too often? Are kids already anticipating what your are going to use to illustrate a point? When you pull out that prop, are they saying “Oh, that again…”?

Look over your service planning sheets for the last year and count the number of times your commonly used props have been used. Is it time to store that away? Give it away? THROW IT AWAY?

I’m preaching to my self here, I know. But let’s all take stock of what we have. Be a good steward of it. Evaluate. Make changes.

Be blessed.

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You’re Not Really HEARING me!

Everything a kid tells you is important. You may not think it’s important, but to that kid, at that moment, it’s the most important thing in their world.

We as adults have, over time, developed a filter called: “THE STUFF IMPORTANT TO ME” filter. And we react accordingly. If someone tells you something that is interesting to YOU – YOU naturally react with genuine interest. YOU react with attention. YOU react because you actually care.

But when someone tells you something that you have no interest in, you may try to react as though you care – because you don’t really want to offend the person trying to tell you something. But you’re not really listening, are you?

When that child walks up to you and shows you his loose tooth… this is a big deal – no wait! It’s a BIG DEAL! When she tells you that it was her birthday yesterday… it’s a BIG DEAL! When a kids tells you that his family is taking him on vacation to “Happy World”, it’s a BIG DEAL! When she explains that her dog is lost… it’s a BIG DEAL. When they point to their new shoes… it’s a BIG DEAL. Should I go on?

How many times have you had one of these experiences to only usher that child to his seat and tell him politely that he can tell you later? After all, it’s time to start class, right.

To a child, you may be the most important person in their life that needs to know this information. Your reaction will determine their significance at that very moment in THEIR WORLD.

Are you really listening?

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It starts from the moment they walk in…

You might have assumed that this whole series of posts was going to be about how to prep and present a better children’s church.  And guess what? Later, I am going to discuss that very thing… but, later.

Before you can start the 5 minute countdown, make a grandiose announcement, send in a crazy character, start your Bible on fire, or eat donuts suspended from a rope, we need some kids to come thru the doors.  If the kids don’t show up, you’d be starting your Bible on fire for, well… nobody.

But what can you do to keep kids from getting bored from the moment they come into your ministry area?

Engage them!  Here are a few suggestions:

  • Decor- Have your ministry room(s) decorated to reflect the theme of your ministry or the topic that you are teaching.  Whether you have the ability, permission and money to deck-out an area for kids or you have to set it up and tear it down; kids know when they are being welcomed and if you’ve prepared for them.  Banners, backdrops, balloons, props/scenery and murals will create an environment that kids will remember.
  • Ambiance- Fun music that is upbeat and fun or anticipatory will help kids feel like this is the place just for them.  Light up the room(s) with different colors to help accent and compliment the look of the room.  Video clips that are familiar or interesting to kids will make a welcoming experience.  AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES – clean up the clutter, vacuum, adjust the temp and eliminate odor!
  • Activities- When kids enter any new environment, their internal intensity changes.  Kids need an outlet for energy. So have some energy-outlet friendly stuff ready. Board games, twister, an art station, simple “carnival”-type games, long-jump contests, high-jump contests, follow the leader, quiz games, treasure/scavenger hunts, video games… Use your imagination.  I mean, look at it as if “nothing kid-friendly is off-limits”.
  • Relational Interaction- Having the leaders in your areas who are initiating interaction will create a memory and set the temperature for an experience.  What do the leaders do?  Ask kid-related questions; about their clothes, school, shoes, movies, video games, toys, pets, vacation, friends, etc.  Having some conversation starters are important.  Read my post about “What I’ve Kept in my Pockets”  These little items will help leaders start conversations and create experiences.

Have I given you something to think about?  More later.

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How can you be creative, innovative, relevant and have fun?  We’d better answer these questions as these are crucial for survival in the #KidMin world.

Ask kids their opinion

I don’t care how or where – just meet with kids for 10 – 30 second and ask their opinion about current trends, fads, and especially your ministry and programs.  And BTW: get ready to have your bubble popped.

Ask your leaders what they are seeing

If your leaders are parents, consumers, TV watchers, surf the internet, have a job, leave their homes, have neighbors, go shopping or do life – they have a valuable opinion and observations that will be different than yours.  They key there is “different” than yours.  Don’t be offended when they don’t agree or have a different opinion.

Go on a field trip and take a camera

Too many pastors/church leaders rarely leave the four walls of their offices to see the world around them.  Hit the local toy stores, video game shops, activity centers, kid-friendly stores and places where kids party.  Take a camera, notepad and a few others with cameras and notepads.

Kid-Friendly Media

Kids watch a lot of TV – go to Kid-friendly channels and watch what these kids watch.  Go to the Kid-Friendly websites and surf what they surf. A little research will tell you what these kids listen to – download it. Find out the latest in books and magazines – read ‘em!

Networking with other #KidMin leaders

Twitter, Facebook, CMConnect.org, Kidology.org, local groups, and face to face/one on one meetings are invaluable!  I’ve said it before:  Get with the leaders of the churches that are the next level size so you can learn what it takes to get there… look to the churches that are about the same size so you can trade ideas that might be more “easily adaptable”… And (ready for this?) Look to the churches that are smaller than yours so you can see the drive, hunger and innovation they have to get to where you’re at now.

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Kids really see stuff in two ways:

1. This is either FUN

or

2. this is really BORING

Yep – that’s really the mindset of a kid.

Now let me bring some definition to the information above…

These two viewpoints of the world are really interpretations of the world around them. For instance: an activity or experience that is exciting, engaging, delicious, funny, intriguing, inclusive or tailored to their wants and needs will be interpreted as “FUN”.

on the other hand… any activity or experience that is uncomfortable, uninteresting, over their heads, too predictable, non-engaging, unfamiliar, not welcoming or negative will most likely be interpreted as “BORING”.

Now here’s what you’ve wanted to hear all day: Children will react differently to each of the two ways that they see the world.

1. If they interpret the world around them as being “FUN”, they will engage, participate and have a positive attitude about that activity or experience. With this experience, you can harness that energy and help guide it into a moment of learning, and experiencing God. This, in my vocabulary is called: “CONTROLLED FUN”. Please take note that, “CONTROLLED FUN” is good.

2. If they interpret the world around them as being “BORING”, they will disengage from the activity, despise the adult who is initiating the “BORING” activity or experience and ultimately, make an attempt to create their own “FUN”. When a child attempts to create their own fun in defiance of the “BORING” activity or simply, quite .possibly a non-existent activity, this, in my vocabulary is called: “UNCONTROLLED FUN”. Please note that “UNCONTROLLED FUN” is NOT good.

How’s your Children’s Ministry doing with all of this?

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You know that moment… the one – you know. You can see it, sense it, feel it in the entire room. It’s the moment when you can look out into the faces of the kids in your class or kids’ service – and… whoa! THEY GET IT!

You know what I’m talking about. It’s that moment when there is a connection from the very words you are saying, the concept you are demonstrating – actually cutting thru the object lessons, songs, skits, video clips and cutting to the heart.

These are the wow moments that I live for in a children’s church setting. It’s the time when it’s the best moment to lead right into a time of response. Whether it’s a time of prayer, a worship song and come forward thing, etc.

Having one of these moments in your children’s church setting is crucial – otherwise, you’re just a really entertaining teacher….

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